“You Have to Do It Yourself, But You Don’t Have to Do It Alone”

 

Hello there,

To those of you who haven’t met me before, my name is Victoria Powell. I love writing so I want to tell you what’s been going on in my life with no restraints. I am a 23 year old female living on Earth but I know that there is so much more to me than that. I feel my soul and my higher self and sometimes I wonder about my past lives as well. There is a man that lives near me. He is older and he is a sound healer too. When I met him, I felt like I was in love.

This feeling I am describing is the feeling of being taken care of. Feeling loved, cared for, supported. Forgetting the rest of the world, and journeying to imaginary places or different dimensions. I feel like he understands my imagination and soul. We even held hands one night on the way back from dinner. We ordered two delicious vegan meals and two beers and he paid for it all! I guess this is the part of me that loves being taken care of.

I used to date a “sugar daddy” that was 47. The truth is, I was never attracted to him physically. But we did have good conversations and enjoy our time together. Now I wouldn’t want to lie to myself in that way again just to have a sugar daddy.

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With this new man, I went to his house one night to relax and drink kava together. We started sitting in Yab-Yum and eventually we started to take our clothes off. When his penis went inside of me, I could feel a different energy, but for some reason I said something and that distracted/ stopped what may have been happening. I suspect that it may have been a tantric energy, but I was almost afraid of letting myself feel that bliss. And that may also be because it’s a very intimate thing. Yes, we had sex, but there are all different kinds of sex. There is sex where you feel infinite trust and safety with your partner. The last time I remember feeling this was with my partner Dominyck. The fact that we were “partners” let me know that I could talk to him about anything or call him whenever I wanted. Anyway, during the session with Eileen Mercolino, I asked about this older man. She said “How does he make you feel?” And I explained that he didn’t want me to sleep over after sex, and he already has other relationship commitments. So she said “be careful of your love connection with him, but he is still there to teach you some things. And you may have had some past life connections as well. Even as I write this, I am nervous about what would happen if he or someone else read this to find out my true feelings. But at the same time, I want to be open and vulnerable with my feelings. So now going forward, we are still friends and more on the same page now.

 

I was feeling a bit stuck after coming home from PEX Summer Festival two days ago. But I just finished this Breathwork exercise using the YouTube video posted above. I really felt the need to cry and let out my emotions. So I breathed and cried along with the video. I am a Reiki Master and sometimes I worry that I have to be perfect energetically before I can heal others. But I know that is definitely not true! I do have to keep a balance of caring for myself as well as others though. During the exercise, I felt similar things to the first time I tried Breathwork at the workshop at Healing Arts Collective. I could feel some stuck energy in my knees, as well as a lot of energy in my hands. I feel glad and proud to call myself a Reiki Master. But in no way does that mean I know everything about reiki and energy healing! I am so excited to keep learning. And maybe the part I enjoy about it is that there are no final answers. It’s a mystical practice and art and I may even create new pathways for myself.

PEX is a bit draining energetically as I drank some alcohol there, and there is loud electronic music everywhere. On the other hand, I met so many amazing people and felt so many amazing energies of love. It was my third year attending, and I imagine something will pull me back again next year. I’m also very excited to go to Burning Man this year!

One of the highlights of PEX this year was meeting April Ramee. She is an Herbal Warrior of Light! Here is her website. She did a workshop on using herbs for transformation. I look forward to attending more of her workshops in the future!April-Ramee-Head-Shot-Color-2

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